Don't Come Begging

When I pull up at a gas station I quickly survey my surroundings. I see the man dog scoping out all the breasts in the area. I see the girl struggling to stretch the fuel hose to the opposite side of the car where the gas tank resides. I can barely see the gas station attendant behind the tinted glass trying really hard not to do any work. I try my hardest never to approach these attendants since they rarely speak any English.

The one person I pay the most attention to is the guy at the bus stop or the one pretending to be on the phone. As soon as I pull up in my shiny car I notice them notice me and they usually start making their way towards me. They spew their tragic tale of poverty and hunger which I can tell is an outright lie simply by the clean clothes they are wearing. I usually cut them off and say "sorry." If they persist I tell them I paid with a card, which I always do. I usually get the "Not even a couple of quarters?"

I hit the same gas stations on a regular basis so I have come to know them well. They too hit the same gas stations on a regular basis. It got to the point where I would reach into my pocket, pull out my wallet and hand them a business card to an employment agency.

If they can be out there in the sun all day, they can work. If my skinny butt can work in a warehouse when times were hard and survive, then they can too.

My ex coworker's father owns a bakery. My ex coworker knew that I absolutely love this cinnamon bundt cake that they use to make. For Christmas one year she brought one for me. I'm not kidding you the entire drive home I would look over at it sitting there decadently in the passenger seat waiting to be eaten.

As I exited the freeway there was a chunky homeless looking dusty blond smoker lady begging at the exit. So close to the holidays I felt terrible about her situation. She knocks on my window and I know I don't have change. I didn't make much back then. Then I glance over longingly at my delicious cinnamon bundt cake. Then back to her. Then the cake. Then to her.

*Sigh.

I lower my window. (It was a manual window in my little Honda Prelude.) I hand her the cake and drive away as the light turns green. I feel good about myself and look back through the rear view with smiling eyes. I see her rip off the top, stick her hands in it as if looking for something then throw the cake and the plastic covering into the street.

I don't remember getting mad. I just felt as if time stopped for me. I drove the rest of the way home in a daze.

my cake

Later I thought, "well, the good deed was done and that was what was more important." Whatever she did was her own doing. Whatever choices she made in life to make her that way were her own. It doesn't diminish the nice thing I did.

Of course that doesn't mean that I would do it again. I do try to help people but I am just very careful about what I do and how I do it. I follow a simple set of rules.

1. If you come to my home, you're not getting a thing.
2. If you can afford a commercial on television, you're not getting a thing.
3. If you are begging across the street from somebody who is working for their money, you can be damn sure you are not getting a freakin' thing and should consider yourself lucky if I don't swerve to hit you with the car.

Where's my holiday spirit? Right here.

No, seriously. Right here.

What is Child's Play? Child's Play is a community based charity dedicated to fulfilling the wish lists of kids in Children's Hospitals around the world. Just click on the little game controller of your hospital of choice on the map displayed on their home page to check out their Amazon list. Be sure to select the shipping address of the hospital rather than your own. You can also buy a T-Shirt or Child's Play Greeting card of which 100% of the proceeds to direct to Child's Play.

Please, this is a genuine charity that I have researched thoroughly that couldn't serve a better cause this holiday season. They also accept PayPal or cash to;

Child's Play
12317 15th Ave NE #108
Seattle, Washington 98125

Please make a sick child smile this Christmas.

~HL