Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Tough Love for the Unhappy Heifers

The answer seems so easy. Whenever girls ask my wife how she stays so fit I want to answer in the meanest way possible. Not just to be mean, but because I am sick of them asking and not heeding the advice or making pitiful excuses. It seems so easy on paper but it’s so much easier to list reasons why they are incapable of doing it.

It is hard. There is NO easy way. There is NO easy magic pill that won't also kill you. It takes hard, CONSTANT work. It takes NO "off the wagon" binging. It takes wanting it enough to stop making excuses.




"I don't have time." Make time. It’s easy. How much do you sleep? How much do you watch T.V.? I'm sure there is one hour a day you can spare if you squeeze it right. Shoot you could watch Oprah and exercise.

The hardest part is starting. Once you get going. Once you are up in the morning breathing the fresh air completing the run you begin is easy.

The foods that you eat make you lazy. Do you find it too hard to get up in the morning? Don't eat so late at night. Go to bed a little earlier. Still have trouble waking up early? Drink a glass of water before you go to bed and your bladder will make sure you get up in the morning. Find your own way just do it and stop making excuses. “I just don’t have the time for that.” Yes, yes you do. You just don’t care enough to make it.

Stop expecting some stupid secret that will solve all your problems and allow you to continue to live your life the way you're living it. Don't be ignorant, that doesn't exist. It never will. Twinkies and french fries are NOT part of the diet of a person that cares about the bulbous behemoth they may become.

Your body is a reflection of the way you are living your life.

You eat cheeseburgers? It shows.
You drink alcohol? Believe me, it shows.
You smoke? It shows.
You do drugs? It shows, and smells and your attitude is terrible.
You stay up late and don’t get enough good sleep? It shows.

You are what you eat.
You are a reflection of all you don't do.

If you don't care and are happy fat, then more power to you. Stop complaining and enjoy life. Just don't cry to anyone else that you can't stop while you are stuffing your face.

Take a look around every where you go and realize just how many fat people there are in the U.S. now. The difference IS noticeable, and scary.

How many people don't you see parking in handicap spots because they are too lazy to walk?
How many people don't you see ordering their kids around to pick up stuff they dropped or bring items to them because they are too lazy to walk?
How many people don't you see not returning the shopping carts because they are too lazy to walk?

I SEE THIS EVERY DAY. My generation is going to die very young and the next generation even faster. I foresee a huge problem with heart complications and Diabetes in a few years.


Iris said...

This blog is like WOW! O__O

Work is what it takes. And there is room for occasional snacking and rewards.

I love getting into the groove of working out, when I didn't want to in the first place.

I want an apple now ^___^

ryanmortinson said...

i think adding "friend" to the list of "diet, moderation, and exercise" would be appropriate.

when you have someone to keep you accountable, it makes it that much easier.

and if it happens to be a cute girl... talk about incentive...

HektikLyfe said...

>Iris: Yeah its definitely not easy but neither is looking at yourself in the mirror and hating what you see.

>RyanMortinson: I think a friend is a great benefit, but if I add that to the list, it will give the lazy's another excuse. "I don't have a friend that would do that for me wah wah wahhhh." ;) Cute girlfriends or wives are definitely great incentives!

Anonymous said...

Man, there's a better way to go about letting all the 'unhappy heifers' know that there is no magic pill. I kind of detest the fact you use your wife's 'slim and fit' body as some sort of platform for you (who isn't a very healthy or exercise-friendly person in general)to be giving advice to others about weight loss and staying fit. It's somewhat annoying how many times you mention just how fit your wife is. So? It's not as easy as you make it seem -- some people are emotional eaters and they eat because it fills some void in their lives. Yes, there is no magic pill..but don't discount the people who are just genetically pre-disposed to being obese or just average. This is coming from a young, fit, beautiful Indian girl who got here from your wife's vlogging on YouTube.So to say that I'm not some lazy, fat, "unhappy heifer." I gotta say, I won't be returning because you completely turn me off by calling people "unhappy heifers" in the first place.

HektikLyfe said...

Dear Anonymous:

First of all I must apologize for any misunderstanding. If you in any way were under the impression that you were going to find any of my wife's kind words here. We cater to completely different audiences. She is kind, helpful and sensitive. I am not which is why I think we mix so well together. If you came here looking for that, I am truly sorry. But that is all I will apologize for.

Please pay close attention to the title of this blog. It is very important. Specifically the words "Tough Love" and "Unhappy." Do you know or understand the purpose of "Tough Love?"

F.Y.I. "Tough love is an expression used when someone treats another person harshly or sternly with the intent to help them in the long run."

"...there's a better way to go about letting all the 'unhappy heifers' know that there is no magic pill."

Is there? It doesn't seem to be working. If you live in the U.S. then you know that obesity is an ever growing problem. Sensitivity to the topic isn't helping either. I think it is exactly that sensitivity to discuss this issue that is at fault. Even more so is the fact that not only are these overweight individuals too sensitive to acknowledge the fact that they are unhealthy but now we have people being sensitive and offended on their behalf. What kind of crap is that?

"I kind of detest the fact you use your wife's 'slim and fit' body as some sort of platform..."

Platform? I never used her hard work as a "platform." I used only myself as an example. Her situation was only what inspired the blog. If you cared enough to know, then you would know that we both come from families that inspire "genetic" obesity. We both have overweight parents and family members. As a woman, I'm sure my wife has to work harder, as they always do and I understand that. People ask her what she does and she tells them. They ask but then seem to cover their ears. All I hear in response is a bunch of B.S. excuses. I know she works really hard to keep fit and I acknowledged that. How is that using her as a platform?

"..you...who isn't a very healthy or exercise-friendly person in general...to be giving advice to others about weight loss and staying fit."

So because I don't like exercise I am not allowed to tell people what works? Do you realize that this is exactly the type of negative thinking that keeps these heart-attack prone individuals the way they are? I disagree, I think I am the PERFECT example. I am skinny (some people might be offended by being called that) and I STILL lost weight. So overweight people could stand to lose a whole lot more.

"It's somewhat annoying how many times you mention just how fit your wife is."

Once. You mentioned it more times than I did. But I think in your statement their you kind of made yourself clear as to what your issues truly are. I didn't mention "just how fit" she was. I said she was fit and people ask her how she does it. The only reason I could imagine someone finding it annoying is if they were personally offended that someone else was fit and they weren't.

"It's not as easy as you make it seem..."

Did you READ my blog? Second paragraph, "It is hard. There is NO easy way...It takes hard, CONSTANT work." I NEVER said it was easy to do. I said it LOOKED easy on paper but that it was NOT easy.

"...some people are emotional eaters and they eat because it fills some void in their lives."

Then they have more serious psychological problems they need to resolve. Perhaps Ryan's advice of a caring friend could help.

"...but don't discount the people who are just genetically pre-disposed to being obese or just average."

I don't, in fact according to you I used one of them as my "platform." Not to mention myself.

"So to say that I'm not some lazy, fat, 'unhappy heifer.'"

There is no way to know if you are or are not. I would not know you nor could I ever truly know you over this medium. This is the point I was getting to earlier about the significance of the words used in the title. Take "Unhappy" for this instance. This blog was written for Unhappy Heifers. "If you don't care and are happy fat, then more power to you." If, however; you are unhappy being fat, then here is something you can do and information you need to acknowledge. Do you understand now? I have NO problem with overweight people if they are happy. Some overweight people can be some of the nicest people I know. As a matter of fact they are! But if an overweight person is going to sit there and complain constantly about their weight and how they can't this and they can't that...then they need to get mad, and burn off the energy at the gym.

"I gotta say, I won't be returning because you completely turn me off by calling people 'unhappy heifers' in the first place."

I have to say I'm grateful for that. Not because I am trying to be petty. But I only want responses and comments from strong individuals that like to argue their points and stick up for them instead of just spouting them out in an un-researched tantrum then storming out of the room.

Anonymous said...

Damn... talk about a slap in the face... I must say, I am one of those people that constantly complain about my weight and my looks... I loved your blog! It's hard enough trying to stay on track but it's even harder when you have people (who of course have good intentions) who accept the lame ass excuses and just help justify the lazyness... Kudos to you... hopefully some other person (like myself) reads this and stays inspired to stay on the hard path!

HektikLyfe said...

>Anonymous2: Thanks for the support. I didn't mean for it to be any form of aggressive response or slap in the face though. I was just trying to clarify what I had stated in my original blog so that there wouldn't be any opportunity for further misinterpretation.

Our society makes it too easy to turn a blind eye, to ignore it and turn to surgery as the answer.

The corporate, capitalist answer to the obesity problem goes something like this...

"Well, we can't have them stop watching T.V., we'd lose revenue. We can't stop advertising for junk foods, we'd lose revenue. We can't have them start eating natural foods that we don't manufacture, we'd lose revenue. Instead lets brainwash them into thinking that makeup, psychiatric drugs and surgery are worthwhile alternatives to diet and exercise."

Anonymous said...

Look, I'm sorry I came off like a bitch. Truth is I am a little overweight but I just can't control myself when I am around delicious food. You hit a nerve when you mentioned crying while eating. I tend to do that alot. I watch your wife and I really want to hate her for looking as good as she does but she is such a nice person. You just provided that escape. You were the closest thing to her that I could get mad at. I've had time to calm down and now realize that my anger stemmed from my self-loathing. I just can't stop myself, I have a snack in front of me as I type now. There really isn't any hope for me. Surgery is the only option.

BridgetSmash. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ivy said...

man, we're the generation of remote controls, electric beaters, fast cars, fast food ..and a whole bunch of other stuff that teaches us to want things NOW. it seems so obvious to me how the western world is the way it is. i think we should all go back to the old, simple days of agriculture and farmland. :)

HektikLyfe said...

>Bridget: Why did you delete your comment? It wasn't offensive at all...

>Ivy: You would think that such a direct civilization (NOW) wouldn't be so easily offended by direct comments. People call me skinny all the time. I don't cry or complain. I agree and tell them I need to eat differently and exercise more. That is the way life is. If I get super bulbous fat and start heavy breathing just by getting out of the car, I hope someone in this world care enough to tell me to change my eating habits.

Home agriculture is something we SHOULD all do but I don't imagine it to be something our capitalist lifestyles would allow. Many laws are in place to protect "farmers", i.e. corporations, from financial instability. We aren't allowed to grow certain things without licenses and permits and other rules and regulations that would involve us paying a lot of money which we could only hope to regain by becoming legitimate businesses, legitimately.

Why would they allow us do that, we could be independent and they don't want that.

In a country that was founded by revolution, they have learned well how to keep their citizens unarmed and sedated.

Angela said...

I haaaate the word "diet," and I think people get turned off by it right off the bat. We eat a lot in my house, but it's almost a complete whole foods diet. I make almost everything from scratch (bread, stocks, even butter, etc.) and do everything in my power to avoid processed foods. I also work out almost every day, even if I can only fit in 20 minutes on the elliptical, so that helps a lot. It's amazing how exercise helps in all areas of your life, not just the waistline.

The word "diet" has a different meaning than most people think. It doesn't mean you're stuck with rice cakes and salad with no dressing, it means that one has to be conscious of what they put into their mouths, not just how much. You should read the book The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Polan, it's really good.

HektikLyfe said...

Whoa I missed this post. Sorry it took so long to get back to you Angela. I didn't receive an e-mail for it... :S

I do think you are right. The word "Diet" scares people. I think they believe it is synonymous with fasting.